Depression Stops Millionaire Poker Pro

You may know him from all the way back to 2011 when he reached a high many poker players dream of, at EPT Berlin. You may know him from television with his long red hair and his cool shades ready to conquer the EPT live green felt. You may know him by his online username ‘NeverScaredB’ and his very aggressive style of play. Heck, you may even know him for his blog and his courageous act of admitting he’s clinically depressed one year later, in 2012. But what you probably don’t know is that at the end of last year, he took the boldest decision of them all - quitting the game he dedicated himself for eight years altogether.

And now five months after making that decision, he made yet another courageous act and decided to open up to the poker community about his condition.

$5M Online and $1.4M Live

Before talking about his interview though, let’s talk about the feats Ben Wilinofsky achieved in the last eight years, as a full-time poker pro.

Like many other successful young pros, Wilinofsky built his bankroll online by grinding day in and day out the MTTs on the major poker sites. Known by many as ‘NeverScaredB’ - his online alias on PokerStars and the defunct Full Tilt - he started crushing the MTT scene in the late 2000s and early 2010s. Overall, according to PocketFives, he won $4,966,887 online; most of his winnings came from his numerous PokerStars and Full Tilt cashes: he cashed $3.4 million on PS and over $1.2 million on FT.

He took the live green felt by storm in 2011 at the age of 23 winning EPT Berlin for over $1.1 million. He was on cloud nine following the big win but that feeling quickly faded according to him. One year later, he made yet another final table, at WPT Vienna, finishing third and cashing in over $163,000. But, as opposed to the EPT Berlin days, in Vienna he felt nothing ‘devoid of any kind of emotional response.’ So, in spite of his obvious poker talents, he slowly but surely participated in less and less live tournaments. His last cash happened in 2013 at the WSOP APAC in Melbourne. His total live earnings totaled $1,390,563, according to HendonMob DB.

So what actually happened?

Poker’s Not The Problem But It’s Not Part Of The Solution Either

In 2012, during Movember, Wilinofsky posted a blog which may have come to a shock for many wannabes poker pros and Wilinofsky fans. He revealed a dark truth well-hidden behind his poker face at the tables:

Living up to his online alias, he boldly admitted his condition starting with his mother - who is actually a doctor - and finishing with the whole poker community. Many couldn’t and still can’t understand how such a wealthy young man with so much freedom can actually be depressed. The thing is they don’t have to. Wilinofsky said at that time:

Almost three years later, a completely different version of ‘NeverScaredB’ - more humble and much more calculated as compared to 2011 - appeared in front of the camera, in a PokerNews interview. He talked about how he handled his depression, how he spent less and less time playing poker and how hard it is to give up the game entirely, after putting in the effort and handling the stress for so long. But later last year, he finally realized that poker was actually the ‘easy solution to the wrong problem.’

Wilinofsky accepted yet another interview just last week in which he talked about his decision to give up the game entirely. He told PokerListings that for many years he seeked an outside solution for his internal struggles like winning more money or have sex with more girls. He said:

He realized to try and help himself, first of all he had to be honest with himself and others. He had to get rid of his poker face that nothing can really touch him, stop building walls around him and just be himself, a man, like all of us, with vulnerabilities. He also had to face the fact that poker didn’t complete him as a human being. That liberated ‘NeverScaredB.’

What lies beyond though, after his successful poker career, not even Wilinofsky knows. He knows that much: he needs to start doing something else, something that can make him fulfilled:

Editor’s Take: Remembering Daniel Colman’s Statement

Two years ago, at the WSOP $1 million buy-in Big One for One Drop event, after winning the whole thing and cashing in over $15 million, Daniel Colman - another successful young poker pro who started his career online - refused to talk to the media about his outstanding success. A few days later, he posted on 2+2 his reasons becoming one of the fewest pros out there bold enough to talk about the ‘ugly’ side of the game.

Many called him a hypocrite and a liar yet, after watching the PokerListings interview, anyone can realize he’s not that far from the truth, on the contrary, Colman like Wilinofsky was courageous enough to talk about the big poker downsides also. Indeed, poker has a very dark side filled with addiction, anxiety and whether we like it or not, despair. It may be rewarding for some of us but for many others, the game can have a destructive effect on their lives. Yes, the thrill of winning big can be exhuberating but that thrill is temporary and it can’t actually heal deep wounds that may have to do with the human beings’ flaws.

And Ben Wilinofsky is the perfect example of why we should be very careful when we dedicate ourselves to the game or when we start encouraging anyone to give poker a shot. Remember, poker is not a quick fix and many former and current grinders - Ben and Daniel included - know that. Behind those bright lights, those piles of cash and the ‘boss life’, dark things may and could hide, things that can alter the very fabric that makes us empathic and social human beings.

Most of the times, like in Ben’s case, poker is actually the wrong solution to our uneventful life. Don’t you agree?